And Lord I Can't Ask Why?

One tear of thousands left to cry as parents ask the question why? How is it that I sent my elementary age child to school today and that was my last kiss goodbye? When I walked her to the classroom door no one told me we would hold hands no more. I placed her in this institution that was to help me build her future. She trusted me when I said this place would be safe and that she need not fear when I walked away. I shed this single tear with thousands yet to follow as I must now identify my child's body. The Christmas list replaced with burial task and God you tell me not to ask? I am searching my brain for memories of this morning. Did she show me signs that she was sick, did I force her to go to school when I had reason to keep her home? Were my last words did you brush your teeth or did I give her a hug? Did we sing on the way to school or say our morning prayers? Lord I just hope that we did not have an unresolved fight. God how she must have been so scared. And Lord I can't ask why? My child's future cut short from this cowards damaged mind. He had to be mentally ill to watch all those children die. Anything short makes him a pure monster and if killing him twice would bring my baby back then I would sit in jail for life just to know she lives. How do you offer support to a community devastated? If your child survived how do you gather the courage to send them back to school or ease their fears that somehow NOW this place is safe? How do they return to a classroom where they survived, but watched their little friends murdered? And Lord I Can't Ask Why? Well you have to give me a pass this time, because I NEED TO KNOW WHY?